So after reviewing agencies for the past week (I've been reviewing and researching agencies for months but had already narrowed it down based on age requirements and qualifications, location, etc), we narrowed it down to two agencies in Georgia. I asked my dad look over both agencies extensiveley since he's really good with legal documents and right away he nixed one. One that we were considering sounded good but what I had failed to notice right there in front of my eyes is for part of their fees they said you had to pay a non-refundable $10,000 up front from the get-go. Um, YIKES. I don't know how I didn't even catch that...maybe because there were so many figures on the page that my eyes were not drawn to that. I'm so thankful he caught that because he saved us time and possible even money. So I am happy and nervous to say that we have one agency we will be going with if all goes well at the free orientation meeting. I'm happy because it makes life easier to just have one for consideration and they are also the largest adoption agency in the country. On the other hand, it makes me nervous because I wish I had at least two to pick from.
I'm also happy to say that my husband and I have definitely decided on what kind of baby we want. We are open to either a caucasian infant or a bi-racial infant. I don't know why but I am leaning more towards a bi-racial baby and I think Kyle is, too. At first we were considering a bi-racial baby with a couple of different agencies because of cost. I know that is not a very good reason to want a specific type of child but honestly when it comes down to it money is important. The agency that we are (more than likely) going with does not have a price difference between caucasian and bi-racial...and what's really funny is we are still kind of hoping we get a bi-racial child.
I am just ready to start the home study process. Once the home study is completed we can start applying for grants and scholarships. My family is really on board with us adopting and my parents are really excited. It just thrills my heart! I feel like I walk a little quicker now and smile a little more. What really makes my heart want to burst with happiness is how on board my husband is with it. It makes me so happy we are finally on the same page with adoption. He even wanted to start pricing cribs yesterday. He also gave his beloved UFC professional punching bag/stand away to my brother to make room for our future (totally his idea).
I know we are in for a long process and I just hope this orientation calms any nervousness and fears we may have. I have read many reviews on this organization and they are mostly negative. It is true that people with negative comments are more likely to review a place.
Monday, August 23, 2010
Sunday, August 15, 2010
A Peaceful Heart
God is amazing with the peace He gives us and the way He has a plan for us from the very beginning.
At the end of next month, my husband and I will be attending a (free) orientation at a very well known adoption agency. More specifically, we will be attending the Domestic Infant Adoption Orientation class and we could not be more excited. I am still looking into agencies and possibly adoption attorneys but I thought I would get the ball rolling and see what this particular agency has to say. I've always heard about them on the show Adoption Stories and they were also featured on 16 and Pregnant. I've read about them and researched their site and emailed back and forth with a lady who works there.
Kyle and I told our parents this weekend. My younger sister already knew because I had been talking with her about it. I was very hesitant to tell my parents because I thought they would say that we are too young and crazy for doing this at our ages. I could not have been more wrong and I am so thankful for that. I was nervous about telling them all day yesterday so finally, as I was helping my Mom with the dishes, I said, "Ya'll will never believe where we are going next month." My dad responded with, "Alaska? Boston? Charleston?" It was kind of funny but very appropriate because Kyle and I have been talking about going to either Alaska or Boston next year and Charleston sometime this year. I just laughed and said no and told them I knew they would say we were young and crazy. I then told them we would be attending an orientation on adoption. I really had prepared myself for words I didn't want to hear. Don't get me wrong - my parents are the most supportive people on this planet and for that I am truly grateful. I consider my parents to be the best parents on this planet. I just thought they would say with me being 25 and Kyle being 24, we had many years ahead of us to still try and have children. I had mentally prepared what I would say to them. Well, I didn't have to say any of the mentally prepared statements. They had some questions and of course my dad brought up the cost factor, "I have a friend who adopted from Guatemala a few years ago and it cost him over $26,000." I let them know we are currently only interested in domestic adoption. They took it well. A few hours later my mom and I went walking and she brought it up and had a few questions. When I told her how relieved I was that they were so encouraging, she said of course they were going to be encouraging. She then said that she always watches me and my husband with our niece and just knows that we are more than ready to be parents and will be wonderful parents to a lucky baby. I was really happy she said that. She did ask what would happen if I got pregnant during the adoption process (like, if I get pregnant and we have already been matched with a baby). I told her we would continue on with the adoption and look at it as God's will for us.
I am so thankful to know that we have our parents support.
We are prepared for what people are going to say about it...and honestly, we don't care about the negativity. Sure, it might hurt a little but we feel like God has been saying that it's our time to become parents and we couldn't be happier. I know we still have so much to learn about adoption.
At the end of next month, my husband and I will be attending a (free) orientation at a very well known adoption agency. More specifically, we will be attending the Domestic Infant Adoption Orientation class and we could not be more excited. I am still looking into agencies and possibly adoption attorneys but I thought I would get the ball rolling and see what this particular agency has to say. I've always heard about them on the show Adoption Stories and they were also featured on 16 and Pregnant. I've read about them and researched their site and emailed back and forth with a lady who works there.
Kyle and I told our parents this weekend. My younger sister already knew because I had been talking with her about it. I was very hesitant to tell my parents because I thought they would say that we are too young and crazy for doing this at our ages. I could not have been more wrong and I am so thankful for that. I was nervous about telling them all day yesterday so finally, as I was helping my Mom with the dishes, I said, "Ya'll will never believe where we are going next month." My dad responded with, "Alaska? Boston? Charleston?" It was kind of funny but very appropriate because Kyle and I have been talking about going to either Alaska or Boston next year and Charleston sometime this year. I just laughed and said no and told them I knew they would say we were young and crazy. I then told them we would be attending an orientation on adoption. I really had prepared myself for words I didn't want to hear. Don't get me wrong - my parents are the most supportive people on this planet and for that I am truly grateful. I consider my parents to be the best parents on this planet. I just thought they would say with me being 25 and Kyle being 24, we had many years ahead of us to still try and have children. I had mentally prepared what I would say to them. Well, I didn't have to say any of the mentally prepared statements. They had some questions and of course my dad brought up the cost factor, "I have a friend who adopted from Guatemala a few years ago and it cost him over $26,000." I let them know we are currently only interested in domestic adoption. They took it well. A few hours later my mom and I went walking and she brought it up and had a few questions. When I told her how relieved I was that they were so encouraging, she said of course they were going to be encouraging. She then said that she always watches me and my husband with our niece and just knows that we are more than ready to be parents and will be wonderful parents to a lucky baby. I was really happy she said that. She did ask what would happen if I got pregnant during the adoption process (like, if I get pregnant and we have already been matched with a baby). I told her we would continue on with the adoption and look at it as God's will for us.
I am so thankful to know that we have our parents support.
We are prepared for what people are going to say about it...and honestly, we don't care about the negativity. Sure, it might hurt a little but we feel like God has been saying that it's our time to become parents and we couldn't be happier. I know we still have so much to learn about adoption.
Monday, August 9, 2010
Adoption Confusion
This past weekend I went to Babies R Us to purchase some baby gifts for two out of the seven women I know who are having babies this fall.
I enjoy picking out baby items - I really do. When I was in Babies R Us this weekend I had an overwhelming feeling of sadness come over me. When I told my husband that it made me a little sad to be there shopping for other people and not our own baby, he said he felt the exact same way. For the most part I've gotten out of the mentality of constantly thinking, "Right now I should have a five month old baby." The idea of getting pregnant is still a fond idea to me and one that I will always hope for and wish for (maybe some day). I am baffled whenever I see a pregnant woman and see the size of her stomach...it just amazes me that a human being is inside of there. I hope to someday know what that truly feels like (yes, I was pregnant but I wasn't far enough along to be able to feel the baby).
I'm not "giving up" as some may put it but I am at peace when I say that my husband and I have decided to really amp up the adoption research and even look into getting a home study done. Ideally we would like to start the actual adoption process as soon as he gets done with his training for his new career, which will probably be in December or January. With the recommendation of a former roommate who now is the director at a pregnancy crisis center, I researched an adoption agency that is about an hour and a half from where I live. I became really excited because even though this agency is still expensive (expensive to me), it is way less expensive than a lot of the other agencies around here. This agency was looking like a true possibility and I was all ready to send in an application for the home study but I noticed this agency requires both adoptive parents to be 25 years of age. My husband won't be 25 until April. I called the agency to ask them about this and they said they won't even accept applications until both people are 25 (some agencies will go ahead and do the home study just so long as both people are 25 by the time of the adoption). I have been researching the state law for the adoptive parent age in my state but I am so confused. Many places say 25 years old but some say it just depends on the agency you work with. I am trying to find out what is Georgia's legal requirement in general. My sister knows someone who was going through the adoption process (during her adoption physical she found out she was pregnant) and she was only 23 years old at the time. So I am really confused. If, for some reason, Georgia's minumum age requirement for any type of adoption is 25 years old then we are going to be positive about it since that will give us some more time to really save up and possibly find a birth mother so we can do an independent/private adoption since those are less expensive than going through an agency.
I doubt any of this makes sense. As usual, my thoughts are jumbled up with excitement and nervousness so we will just take one step at a time. I just want to become a parent.
I enjoy picking out baby items - I really do. When I was in Babies R Us this weekend I had an overwhelming feeling of sadness come over me. When I told my husband that it made me a little sad to be there shopping for other people and not our own baby, he said he felt the exact same way. For the most part I've gotten out of the mentality of constantly thinking, "Right now I should have a five month old baby." The idea of getting pregnant is still a fond idea to me and one that I will always hope for and wish for (maybe some day). I am baffled whenever I see a pregnant woman and see the size of her stomach...it just amazes me that a human being is inside of there. I hope to someday know what that truly feels like (yes, I was pregnant but I wasn't far enough along to be able to feel the baby).
I'm not "giving up" as some may put it but I am at peace when I say that my husband and I have decided to really amp up the adoption research and even look into getting a home study done. Ideally we would like to start the actual adoption process as soon as he gets done with his training for his new career, which will probably be in December or January. With the recommendation of a former roommate who now is the director at a pregnancy crisis center, I researched an adoption agency that is about an hour and a half from where I live. I became really excited because even though this agency is still expensive (expensive to me), it is way less expensive than a lot of the other agencies around here. This agency was looking like a true possibility and I was all ready to send in an application for the home study but I noticed this agency requires both adoptive parents to be 25 years of age. My husband won't be 25 until April. I called the agency to ask them about this and they said they won't even accept applications until both people are 25 (some agencies will go ahead and do the home study just so long as both people are 25 by the time of the adoption). I have been researching the state law for the adoptive parent age in my state but I am so confused. Many places say 25 years old but some say it just depends on the agency you work with. I am trying to find out what is Georgia's legal requirement in general. My sister knows someone who was going through the adoption process (during her adoption physical she found out she was pregnant) and she was only 23 years old at the time. So I am really confused. If, for some reason, Georgia's minumum age requirement for any type of adoption is 25 years old then we are going to be positive about it since that will give us some more time to really save up and possibly find a birth mother so we can do an independent/private adoption since those are less expensive than going through an agency.
I doubt any of this makes sense. As usual, my thoughts are jumbled up with excitement and nervousness so we will just take one step at a time. I just want to become a parent.
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