I'm feeling much more positive than I was yesterday. I realize we do not have to use an adoption consultant...especially one that tells me that I will need to increase my budget to $35,000 in order to receive a baby in 3-12 months. While I know having a lot of money helps with adoption, to me it almost sounds like baby-brokering. I am still waiting to hear back from the consultant to hear how much my budget will need to be if I use them for a bi-racial adoption. I'm also looking into an adoption agency that is based out of Texas but has an office in North Carolina. Maybe the Bethany agency will work out. Who knows. I am going to continue to explore all of my options.
When I got home from work yesterday my husband could tell I was pretty down about everything. He told me that it will be okay and that we are not going to let money stop us. He figures if we go with a reasonably priced agency than it will all be okay. He also reinforced that if we do not get a baby right away then we shouldn't sweat it...it just gives us more time to save. I talked to my mom this morning and told her a little about the consultant group. She told me that she feels that no matter what agency, consultant, whatever we use she feels that God will give us a baby someway, somehow sooner rather than later. She also said she still believes we will have a biological baby of our own.
While I appreciate the encouragement and while that would be wonderful, I am really excited to start the adoption process. I also don't like to think that maybe one day we will have a biological child because I've already come to the place where I am okay with everything and I feel it unncessary to revel with that idea.
By the way, I like to periodically change the music from time to time based on how I feel. The former song on there was Song to Sing from my favorite band. Even if you don't like Hanson I would be pretty surprised if you said you didn't think the song was pretty. It's so beautiful (and it's a really old song from them, too). The new song I have is Michael Buble's Haven't Met You Yet. It's how I feel about my future baby...I know I will one day be a parent and it's so exciting because I know a baby is out there for me...I just haven't met him or her yet!
Money is important in adoption, but it's not everything. Trust me. Both our adoptions ended up being "less than expected" dollar-wise. We were ready to go with an agency and then met Ben's birth mom, which meant a lot of good things, including a final cost that was about 10% of what we thought we were getting into with the agency. All of this to say -- just follow God's lead. He'll get you to the child that is perfect for you and Kyle.
ReplyDeleteThat is very encouraging, Kristin! All of the adoption attorneys I have contacted told me they don't help you find a birth mother...so I kind of had to eliminate going that route. I'm actually re-checking into the agency you told me about that ya'll were going to go with before meeting Ben's birth mother. A few weeks ago I emailed my pastor to see if he ever helped prospective adoptive parents find birth mothers. His secretary said she would ask him but I'm not really counting on them getting back with me since it's a huge church. I've also inquired at one pregnancy crisis center but they said they didn't really do that sort of thing.
ReplyDeleteI think an agency is our only route at this point!